The Onion and the Third Amendment
The National Anti- Quartering Association, America’s foremost Third Amendment rights group, held its annual gala in Washington Monday to honor 191 consecutive years of advocating the protection of private homes and property against the unlawful boarding of military personnel.
“This is a proud day for quarters-owners everywhere,” said the organization’s president, Charles Davison, in his keynote address. “Year after year, we have sent a loud and clear message to the federal government and to anyone else who would attack our unassailable rights: Hands off our cottages, livery stables, and haylofts.”
“Pro-quartering advocates are waiting for just the right moment to stick a bunch of troops in our homes,” Davison said. “Well, I say to them that we will never allow this to happen. You can count on the true patriots of the NAQA to ensure that no chickens and livestock will be appropriated, and private stores of salt, brandy, candles, and vinegar will stay firmly where they belong: in civilian hands.”
This kind of reminds me of this video: